I just woke up from a dream say (Well a many hours ago now, but it was 10 minutes ago when i was originally writing this). When i first awoke i was genuinely in shock. It felt so real? everything seemed aligned; nothing seemed off.
I was at my aunties house playing chess with family, and then my phone rang, "Elsa" was calling. I hadn't any idea who she was, yet i felt a sense of urgency to take the call privately. Of course my family teased me while i hurried off outside to take it, when i answered it was this girl. It was a facetime, her face was interesting, a mix between the modern "Chav" aesthetic & natural beauty. We talked, i can't remember specifically what we conversed about but i ended up figuring out she was my girlfriend. My family followed me outside, probably a subconscious display of how intrusive these cunts are, and took my phone. Again, i can't remember exactly what was said but they also ended up figuring out she was my girlfriend. Much to their surprise as well since I've never even attempted relations in the past. Teasing followed, then a sense of pride and comfort i suppose, of me having a partner. I think after that there was a jump, well no, a "Glitch" so to speak, i was outside the back garden of this house.
There i met my "Girlfriend". Not much can be said about her appearance, some typical feminine attire, i think a white hoodie and jeans. We walked and talked, again i can't remember, it was distinctly romantic though.
Then i was in the car, heading to a unknown location, i was talking to her on snapchat. Then i started checking my messages, i was in some beef with some disgusting negroid and his girlfriend. Now here's where i started to freak the fuck out (I was still under the life-like dream guise of reality)
I don't know any of these people, why am i in beef with this person? who is he? who's the woman I've decided is my girlfriend? where the fuck am i headed?
It was confusing. Eventually i came to the conclusion that I'd truly lost it, some split personality situation. Did i really go so fucking insane that I'd what, made a figment of a "happy" "ideal" life? (No beef isn't apart of my ideal world, my reasoning for this in the dream was that my mind wouldn't allow for complete peace and satisfaction regardless of my mental state) or had i been riding in the back seat of my own mind this entire time, only to take the steering wheel now?
Now, i "Glitched" from the car to my "mates" house (Some chubby MTN manlet, funny though)
He had a extremely normie personality, and this was confusing since i really hate normies. We hung out for a bit, i was going to tell him about my situation before a complete mental breakdown but i was "Transported" into bed with my girlfriend. And no, we weren't fucking, you degenerate. We were just laying in bed and doing well normal things. I had noticed that on the outside she displayed a obnoxiously NT normie personality, but behind closed doors she was just as aspie as i. I was happy with my life, i had also received many praise for my looks throughout this dream, i approximate i was around m/hhtn. Ideally built with a "Naturaly muscular" physique.
Then i started drifting back into consciousness, and the realisation hit me. "Jesus fucking christ i need to sort my life out immediately". NEVER before had i dreamed of stuff like this, and my life isn't even particularly bad right now, it's Christmas, im starting to look better, etc etc. am i genuinely so miserable that no matter my current situation I'll always crave more? is it greed, or is it repressed human emotion? is it the result of me neglecting my subconscious instincts to socialise for a more anti-social lifestyle? do i actually crave companionship?
I dwelled over these things for almost 30 minutes, it's so fucking over.
This is probably cage fuel aswell
I was at my aunties house playing chess with family, and then my phone rang, "Elsa" was calling. I hadn't any idea who she was, yet i felt a sense of urgency to take the call privately. Of course my family teased me while i hurried off outside to take it, when i answered it was this girl. It was a facetime, her face was interesting, a mix between the modern "Chav" aesthetic & natural beauty. We talked, i can't remember specifically what we conversed about but i ended up figuring out she was my girlfriend. My family followed me outside, probably a subconscious display of how intrusive these cunts are, and took my phone. Again, i can't remember exactly what was said but they also ended up figuring out she was my girlfriend. Much to their surprise as well since I've never even attempted relations in the past. Teasing followed, then a sense of pride and comfort i suppose, of me having a partner. I think after that there was a jump, well no, a "Glitch" so to speak, i was outside the back garden of this house.
There i met my "Girlfriend". Not much can be said about her appearance, some typical feminine attire, i think a white hoodie and jeans. We walked and talked, again i can't remember, it was distinctly romantic though.
Then i was in the car, heading to a unknown location, i was talking to her on snapchat. Then i started checking my messages, i was in some beef with some disgusting negroid and his girlfriend. Now here's where i started to freak the fuck out (I was still under the life-like dream guise of reality)
I don't know any of these people, why am i in beef with this person? who is he? who's the woman I've decided is my girlfriend? where the fuck am i headed?
It was confusing. Eventually i came to the conclusion that I'd truly lost it, some split personality situation. Did i really go so fucking insane that I'd what, made a figment of a "happy" "ideal" life? (No beef isn't apart of my ideal world, my reasoning for this in the dream was that my mind wouldn't allow for complete peace and satisfaction regardless of my mental state) or had i been riding in the back seat of my own mind this entire time, only to take the steering wheel now?
Now, i "Glitched" from the car to my "mates" house (Some chubby MTN manlet, funny though)
He had a extremely normie personality, and this was confusing since i really hate normies. We hung out for a bit, i was going to tell him about my situation before a complete mental breakdown but i was "Transported" into bed with my girlfriend. And no, we weren't fucking, you degenerate. We were just laying in bed and doing well normal things. I had noticed that on the outside she displayed a obnoxiously NT normie personality, but behind closed doors she was just as aspie as i. I was happy with my life, i had also received many praise for my looks throughout this dream, i approximate i was around m/hhtn. Ideally built with a "Naturaly muscular" physique.
Then i started drifting back into consciousness, and the realisation hit me. "Jesus fucking christ i need to sort my life out immediately". NEVER before had i dreamed of stuff like this, and my life isn't even particularly bad right now, it's Christmas, im starting to look better, etc etc. am i genuinely so miserable that no matter my current situation I'll always crave more? is it greed, or is it repressed human emotion? is it the result of me neglecting my subconscious instincts to socialise for a more anti-social lifestyle? do i actually crave companionship?
I dwelled over these things for almost 30 minutes, it's so fucking over.
This is probably cage fuel aswell
.
