Aiphok
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Stop Trying to Look Intimidating - How to Have a Soft Side the Right Way
By: Aiphok
Thread song
Listen to it to be happy
Table of Contents
Introduction
Common Misconception
Power of Emotional Security
What Girls Actually Want
How to Practice Being Genuine
Conclusion
Introduction:
A lot of guys often butcher their day to day interactions because they confuse "looking intimidating" with "looking masculine" They walk around frauding hunter eyes, looking FAR TOO SERIOUS, and radiating no positive energy to the people around them. They act as if having a cold expression will make them look high value.
Now, let's be honest... the majority of these people don't look like a mafia boss, they just look like an autist that is unapproachable and has their walls up.
True masculinity isn't about having a wall constantly up to keep the world out. Rather, it is about having a strong sense of masculinity that allows you to also show genuine warmth. This guide will go over why having this "hyper masculine look" is a huge misconception in this community, and how developing a warm presence actually signals strength and confidence.
Common Misconception:
Let's take a look at the exact behaviors and expressions you shouldn't do
By: Aiphok
Thread song
Listen to it to be happy
Table of Contents
Introduction
Common Misconception
Power of Emotional Security
What Girls Actually Want
How to Practice Being Genuine
Conclusion
Introduction:
A lot of guys often butcher their day to day interactions because they confuse "looking intimidating" with "looking masculine" They walk around frauding hunter eyes, looking FAR TOO SERIOUS, and radiating no positive energy to the people around them. They act as if having a cold expression will make them look high value.
Now, let's be honest... the majority of these people don't look like a mafia boss, they just look like an autist that is unapproachable and has their walls up.
True masculinity isn't about having a wall constantly up to keep the world out. Rather, it is about having a strong sense of masculinity that allows you to also show genuine warmth. This guide will go over why having this "hyper masculine look" is a huge misconception in this community, and how developing a warm presence actually signals strength and confidence.
Common Misconception:
Let's take a look at the exact behaviors and expressions you shouldn't do
- Squinting eyes to fraud hunter eyers
- Always mewing not allowing you to smile (if ur high bf just lose weight bruh)
- Refusing to smile due to thinking it will make you look weak/soft
- Always talking monotone (exception for when it is something serious)
- Always mewing not allowing you to smile (if ur high bf just lose weight bruh)
- Refusing to smile due to thinking it will make you look weak/soft
- Always talking monotone (exception for when it is something serious)
Power of Emotional Security:
Your interactions on a day to day basis stem from two core signals: defensiveness & security
When you refuse to show warmth (not smiling, not letting guard down, etc...), your body language shows that you are insecure and hyper focussed on how people will perceive you. It shows a fragile ego that is constantly trying to protect itself from the environment it is in. A man who can't smile is a man who is afraid of looking "weak."
However, a man who goes about life with a disarming presence shows confidence. Take a moment to think about the people you know that show how happy they are. What do you think of them? They are people who seem to be content with their life. This is confidence. Likewise, when you show care to others, you show stability within yourself. These are the people that others want to be around.
When you see someone smile, your orbitofrontal cortext (part of the brain responsible for sensory reward processing) understands this. It registers a smile as a reward signal, making that person instantly look safe and appealing. Furthermore, smiling leads others to correlate you with themselves being in a good mood. This is because people tend to reflect the facial expression of the other person.
What Girls Actually Want:
Now to the good stuff! There is a massive misconception that women want a 100% cold and hyper masculine man who shows zero emotion. The internet has deemed showing emotion as an ick. However, if you get into the psychology of things, it is the complete opposite (as long as you do it right and not look like a jester). This is because of a concept called The Contrast Effect.
If your resting face seems hostile and closed off, it is a massive red flag. The key to masculinity is contrast: protective physical frame, but being ok to break it with a genuine smile (not talking abt a slight smirk). It makes your masculinity look effortless rather than forced.
@hippocamp after listening to this guide
How to Practice Being Genuine:
Stop frauding facial expressions
Stop trying to hide your natural features. Just let your face relax.
@i_blame_oxytocin frauding huntereyes
Smile with your whole face
A tight smile looks forced and untrustworthy. When you smile, smile with your eyes as well.
@Grif practicing his smile
Have care and empathy for others
Don't think you are "too cool to care." When you are interacting with someone, be fully present. Listen and show real interest in the other person.
@bluesell while talking to the 2/10s
Be welcoming
Be the guy who brings good vibes wherever he goes. You don't have to be loud or a jester. Just be approachable. Be respectful. Strong handshake to men. Respectful hug to women (bonus to throw in the "kisses" to women).
@Includings trying to meet someone
Conclusion:
Live
Laugh
Love (Aiphok)
Please rep for all the effort
Your interactions on a day to day basis stem from two core signals: defensiveness & security
When you refuse to show warmth (not smiling, not letting guard down, etc...), your body language shows that you are insecure and hyper focussed on how people will perceive you. It shows a fragile ego that is constantly trying to protect itself from the environment it is in. A man who can't smile is a man who is afraid of looking "weak."
However, a man who goes about life with a disarming presence shows confidence. Take a moment to think about the people you know that show how happy they are. What do you think of them? They are people who seem to be content with their life. This is confidence. Likewise, when you show care to others, you show stability within yourself. These are the people that others want to be around.
When you see someone smile, your orbitofrontal cortext (part of the brain responsible for sensory reward processing) understands this. It registers a smile as a reward signal, making that person instantly look safe and appealing. Furthermore, smiling leads others to correlate you with themselves being in a good mood. This is because people tend to reflect the facial expression of the other person.
What Girls Actually Want:
Now to the good stuff! There is a massive misconception that women want a 100% cold and hyper masculine man who shows zero emotion. The internet has deemed showing emotion as an ick. However, if you get into the psychology of things, it is the complete opposite (as long as you do it right and not look like a jester). This is because of a concept called The Contrast Effect.
| Online Myth | Real World |
| Girls want an emotionless man | Girls want a man who is physically capable and grounded, but also feel safe to be around |
| Being cold and distant creates desire | Being expressive, in touch with your emotions, and attentive creates desire |
| You must be serious 24/7 | Being physically masculine (doesn't mean you have to be hyper masculine) enough to protect the woman, but also having a soft side |
If your resting face seems hostile and closed off, it is a massive red flag. The key to masculinity is contrast: protective physical frame, but being ok to break it with a genuine smile (not talking abt a slight smirk). It makes your masculinity look effortless rather than forced.
@hippocamp after listening to this guide
How to Practice Being Genuine:
Stop frauding facial expressions
Stop trying to hide your natural features. Just let your face relax.
@i_blame_oxytocin frauding huntereyes
Smile with your whole face
A tight smile looks forced and untrustworthy. When you smile, smile with your eyes as well.
@Grif practicing his smile
Have care and empathy for others
Don't think you are "too cool to care." When you are interacting with someone, be fully present. Listen and show real interest in the other person.
@bluesell while talking to the 2/10s
Be welcoming
Be the guy who brings good vibes wherever he goes. You don't have to be loud or a jester. Just be approachable. Be respectful. Strong handshake to men. Respectful hug to women (bonus to throw in the "kisses" to women).
@Includings trying to meet someone
Conclusion:
Live
Laugh
Love (Aiphok)
Please rep for all the effort
